Most Scattered Blog Ever

I'm so behind, it's not even funny right now. So much to do. No time nor inclination to do it.

I'm not going home this weekend. I haven't made enough money, and, besides, my mama told me that she's going to be ridiculously busy with my grandma being in the hospital and all that. I have enough meds to make it until then, so I think I'll hang out here this weekend.

Speaking of my grandmother, apparently, she has an infectious form of colitis (she already has Crohn's--autoimmune diseases run down that side of the family like you wouldn't believe, which I'm sure is where the genes for my scleroderma came from) that people get from taking antibiotics recently. Something about the antibiotics killing off both the good and the bad bacteria in the colon, which creates a good environment for nasty shit to take hold or something.

Anyway, the doctor said that when old people get this, they usually die. So. Yeah.

Apparently, said doctor didn't realize she'd had diarrhea for upwards of two weeks (more like 3-4 at this point) because the dumbfucks at the hospice place didn't bother charting it. Or mentioning that my grandmother had had antibiotics some 6 weeks ago. So she's been carrying this bacteria that's often fatal to old people around for several weeks now, and these tards didn't even bother following up on it.

I told my mother she needs to take some kind of action toward them because of this. And she was like, "Well, it'd just be a long, drawn-out process that wouldn't be worth it."

Goddammit, it's not about suing someone for money. It's about not allowing incompetence and stupidity and laziness to go on. If they did that to my grandma, they'll do it to someone else. It's YOUR fucking responsibility as a human being to do something to prevent it. I'm not saying you have to go sue. I'm saying, at the very least, go talk to the supervisor of the joint and see if you can get the dumbasses fired. If the supervisor won't take action, go file formal complaints against the people's licensing board. This is NOT rocket science.

I know I sound like a vindictive bitch, and in some ways I am. But I also think that the human race, as a whole, is way too complacent and way too "well, I don't really care that much, and I don't want to have to lift a fucking finger over it" about things.

It's why I have ZERO sympathy for rape victims who say they're too "embarrassed" or too "scared" to report their assault to the police. Goddammit, it's not about YOU and YOUR FEELINGS of "embarrassment." It's about keeping that asshole from doing it to other women. Is YOUR embarrassment more important than preventing the same thing from happening to someone else? File the damn report. If the guy's not prosecuted, that's not your fault. You did what you could. At the very least, if another woman meets him and Googles his name, she'll see that he had the charges brought against him. So she knows what he is. That's all you can do, really, and you should do it.

I realize I'm crusading again. But, goddammit, if more people cared and more people quit acting like a bunch of selfish fucks and took it upon themselves to make the world a better place for their fellow man, this world might not fucking suck so much. But, no, people persist in being lazy fucks and refusing to lift a finger when they see someone else being treated badly because it doesn't concern them or because it's just fucking easier to do nothing. Better them than you, right?

And then, they have the nerve to call ME a bitch because I'm an idealistic person who still believes you should do your best to help other people because you would hope that someone would help you if you were in that boat. You know that post about my principles? This is one of them. Too bad no one else sees it that way. I just feel my social responsibility very heavily.


Anyway. I derailed myself.

I talked to the manager at work today, and she supposedly fixed some of the problems. We'll see. Like I said in my last post, they've got a month. Then, I'm washing my hands of the whole thing and pulling a Judas on them. I honestly don't give a fuck about that massive clusterfuck anymore.


As for the shit on the personal front...I have to get my work shit taken care of first. Hopefully, I'll get caught back up in the next day or two, and I'll work on composing the unwanted email over the weekend and will perhaps send it the first of next week.

I realize I'm dragging it out. But I've been going wide-ass open for weeks now, and I need to finish all these half-done projects before I burn out, which is coming soon.


On the dude front...I was right. This guy's an asshat. I couldn't decide if he was just annoying me last night because I didn't feel well. But I chugged some codeine today to get rid of my headache (woo!), and I was feeling better earlier. He was STILL getting on my nerves. Terribly unsurprising.

Unfortunately, if shit keeps going the way it's been going, I'll probably end up fucking him out of sheer boredom and the need to sublimate the pain inside, or at least make myself hurt for a different reason.

Yes, I realize exactly how fucked up that is.


Oh. A "good" thing, if you can call it that. I've had so much to do, I haven't even had a drink, despite all the hurt and confusion. It's not because I haven't wanted to, though.


The one bright spot in the day is that I fixed my laptop. Yep, you read that right. *I* fixed it. Because despite the fact that I'm sort of useless and ineffectual at most things, I can ghetto-rig shit like nobody's business. Hell, I've always had to. I've been poor my whole life--I and my family. We've never been able to either get things professionally fixed or toss broken shit and get new stuff. Hell, no.

Anyway, you wanna know what I did? LOL. It was redneck engineering at its finest.

Ok, before the whole thing crashed never to start again, it was acting like some of the keys on the keyboard on the laptop were stuck. Now, I don't use the built-in keyboard because I've worn out a lot of the keys. (I'm a writer, fuck you.) Anyway, it was acting like that. The keys didn't look stuck, but it was acting like it had in the past when that had happened.

So I decided today I'd see if I could do something to it, and if I couldn't, I'd turn it over to the tender mercies of the computer repair people.

So I thought about which keys were acting wonky. The F11 key because the browser would randomly full-screen, then un-full-screen, then full-screen again. The F12 key because the menu that pops up when you hit F12 was randomly popping up. The shift keys because it would select multiple things when I'd click with my mouse. The 6 key because it was randomly typing 6s before it died. (Which, by the way, will terrify a paranoid bitch right down to her grew-up-in-the-Baptist-church soul when she's trying to talk to her friends on Yahoo, and her computer is typing "666" over and over by itself!)

So my fat redneck ass grabbed up my laptop and a flathead screwdriver and carefully pried those keys up off the keyboard. Then, I fucked with sensors a little to see if I could "unstick" them, if they were in fact stuck. Then, I said a quick prayer to Jehovah and hit the power button.

Fucker started right up, LOL.


In "celebration" of the drinking I will probably soon be doing...or the fucking random dudes...or both....*Eyeroll*