Lonely

I'm really lonely. The closest friend I have is two hours away. Nobody's got money to come visit, and I can't go anywhere now because my laptop is fucked. I'd have to have a way to work, and without the laptop, I can't. :|

So here I sit.

This time last year, I was so excited to be moving to this place. We were getting out of Jacksonville. It was a fairly nice apartment for not very much money. It seemed like the stepping stone to something bigger.

But now I see it's just like everything else in my life. A black hole that's sucked me in and won't let me out.

I always thought that my bouts of loneliness were just temporary. Something that was difficult to get through, but transient. But no. I see now that the rest of my life is going to be like this.

I don't know if I can stand it.