I shouldn't care. I know I shouldn't.
I shouldn't even think about it.
But I do. I can't help it. It's beyond my control.
I can keep it to myself. I can hide the pain that gnaws at me. I can stay away. I can avoid wreaking havoc on their lives by keeping away. I can bear the pain. I can do all these things.
But I can't forget. I can't help being haunted by them, by ghosts of people who aren't even dead. I can't help loving them still, even the one whose knife I still haven't managed to pull out of my back yet.
No, I can't help loving them. And I damn sure can't help hating myself for it.
You used to captivate me by your resonating light
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face, it haunts my once-pleasant dreams
Your voice, it chased away all the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase....
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